Greetings, Aleksey.
The Holy Fathers (for example, Saint Ignatius Brianchaninov) recommends reciting
memorized prayers. This very much helps to concentrate while saying those prayers
and makes them as if your own. Reading prayers by a book is inevitably distracting
but is necessary in the beginning.
Another mistake made by beginners converted is the absence of expression of
their emotions during a home (reclusory) prayer. This doesn’t imply hypocrisy
or theatricality, but truly experienced emotions instead. This mistake stems
from watching ecclesial prayers where any expression of emotion by the reader,
singers or the minister is prohibited. This prohibition is in place not because
the expression of emotions is evil in itself but because those praying in church
are different and are in different conditions. For this reason it’s forbidden
to impose upon them the emotions experienced by the reader at the moment. That’s
why ecclesial prayers are read in recitative, which doesn’t express specific
emotions and is fit for all present at the prayer.
A home secluded prayer is quite another matter. By all means, it must be accompanied
by an extreme expression of one’s feelings, mainly of repentance, reverence
and humility. Those kinds of emotions are prohibited (including intonation)
so that others would not be confused and also not to advertise one’s emotions
and not to impose them on others and to avoid self-exaltation. For example,
someone came to a temple to express their joy and thankfulness to God for His
mercy or for preserving their life and there’s someone else who came to
make a confession of their sins. It’s clear that it’s impossible
for the reader to express both of those emotions. That is why he just reads
the canvas of a prayer, distinctly conveying it to hearers while both he and
others praying must experience different emotions internally (not showing them
externally), according to their actual state and need. Being at home, however,
it’s appropriate and desired to express all of one’s feelings and
emotions freely through voice, intonation, reverent posture, humble gestures,
bows, crossing one’s arms as do prisoners, beating of one’s breast,
sorrowful waggling of one's head and similar, whatever corresponds with our
repentance, humility and other spiritual feelings and emotions.
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